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Many scholars accuse the Internet of facilitating the stupidity of human kind. But what technology does is simply exacerbate the schism between the dum dumz and those of adequate intelligence. It may not necessarily make smart people smarter, but it certainly allows the people who watched all 10 seasons of Friends to revisit Ross the coolest paleontologist ever, and my word O_Q was he married 3 times! That certainly makes for great comedy! If you think the spinach artichoke dip at the Olive Garden is the best you’ve ever had!
But more than anything, the Internet allows genetic farts that avoided getting social skills a glimpse of false hope. Some guy is marrying a video game character. Personally, if I were this disenfranchised from the world, I would marry myself because that would be more physiologically engaging.
The catch point about this game is that unlike usual dating simulations, the player has to take out the girl on dates and buy her stuff and all the things you would make your girlfriend happy in real life. The groom is now waiting for his wedding reception which will take place on November 22nd, 2009. I wonder what is next in the world of gaming?
Here is some more information about the game:
- The player has to increase their abilities by studying, working out and solving problems of their virtual girlfriend
- If you fail, the game will restart after 100 days
- Real time dating with your virtual girlfriend
*sigh* That’s all that a real relationship requires buying stuff! Weeee. This person isn’t even marrying a smart 2D girl. Whatever this guy is looking for he can find it in Long Island and according to Law And Order SVU, slavery isn’t really over. If there’s anything The Final Destination 3D has taught us, is that, no matter how intellectually unstimulating, mediocre, and logically inconsistent something maybe, it is fucking AWESOME in 3D. You would think the same logic extends to people. Well it doesn’t, that’s why me and this guy kill them. Constantly.
My brother showed me this because he knows I don’t have a soul. v_v Just wait till she starts running!
She can run fine, it’s only when she stops that she does the funky chicken.
They really try to push this whole she “used to be beautiful” thing, that’s kind of, fucking offensive. She’s 1 in a million, but I bet the same thing happened to at least 1000 ugly people. I am sure there has to be some fetish culture for “dystonians.” That retarded voice on a technically not retarded person is making someone moist right now.
I’m sure her husband is ecstatic about this, notice he doesn’t say a fucking word in the whole video. Oh swells, you win some, you lose some… but mostly lose. She can always have a stable career as an exorcism body double.
This is the first draft of a paper for my pop-culture class. Read it and weep.
Britney Spears’ shaved head at face value only seemed culturally relevant because it was shocking, but the significance of one individual’s breakdown quickly became the metaphor of one culture’s implosion: celebrity culture. Britney Spears’ shaved head is culturally significant, because prior when we saw any other “celebrity starlet” bareheaded it was a symbol of strength. Sinead O’Connor, Natalie Portman, Demi Moore, (we’ll ignore that it’s problematic that a woman has to have male attributes to appear strong). These women were revered and admired, artists or dedicated actresses in fulfilling their roles, going against the grain of convention, a woman’s bald head—a celebrity woman’s bald head—meant that she transcended beauty because she didn’t need something that is a paramount part of femininity’s essence—long locks—to appear beautiful.
I know, you’re scared… but intrigued. I’ll elaborate. [If you're using a reader click here to watch the video]
So apparently working out your chin can get rid of your neck waddles! But neck waddles are just extra skin, that makes no sense! These women aren’t even fat, just dumb for participating in this redonkulous commercial.