Good.

Good. GOOOOOD. I read Perez Hilton. I follow him on twitter. I am scum. And if you do these things you are scum too. I never understood why Patrice gave up Celerbity Gossip, gossip being the operative word. I didn’t understand why she tried to lay off Bald Britney, I figured, I want to see the train wreck, they’re showing me the train wreck, so I’m going to watch. It’s fucking funny.

I make fun of people on here, in real life, I make fun of people all the time. People do stupid shit and it’s fun to point and laugh. I think it’s important have opinions and blogging certainly gave everyone and anyone a voice, but I think in order for you opinions to have credence they needed to be grounded in some sort of truth.

Proof that he is a douche, emails sent between Perez and some party planner company:

From: Jose Martinez, Harrison & Shriftman
To: Perez Hilton
Date: 2/6/06

Someone just sent this to me….. was this comment in response to you not being invited to our party?

“The Maxim party overflowed with celebs and VIPs who decided not to go to the Playboy party, which was very far away, at the airport.”

Thank goodness, only non-insiders read your unreliable page. You need to really be more responsible if you desire longevity in this business. I understand being snarky, but lies only make you look stupid in the end. I trust you’ll see our media coverage in the coming days and see who and what our party really was like.

From: Perez Hilton
To: Jose Martinez
Date: Mon, 6 Feb 2006 14:52:29 -0500

…You may choose not to invite me and invite a blogger who gets 1/3 of the traffic I do, and I can choose to write whatever I play.

I never claim to be objective. In fact, I reslish in my perspective and point of view. That’s why people visit my site, so much that I get more visitors in ONE day that visit me than read Star or OK in one week.

If and when Harrison Shriftman decides that I am “worthy” of being invited to your events, then I will begin to give them favorable coverage….

To point out the blatantly obvious, this fat fat fuck who is obsessed with fame and the idea of celebrity just uses his notoriety to crawl further and further into the assholes of celebrities who probably feel so inclined to be nice to him in order to save face in the media because his website is so clearly biased. I don’t think he’s ever written anything bad about Zac Efron or the Jonas Brothers since he wants their hot teenage beef or Lady GaGa because she panders to gay people. Every picture on his site features his smug face superficially standing next to someone that people actually give a fuck about.

And jesus christ, his fucking “album” that I’m sure sold even less copies than his clothing line. His shit ass, garage band music that he has the nerve to put out after constantly condemning Miley Cyrus’ lack of a talent, but let’s be fair he does like Katy Perry. Oh yeah and he wrote a book that no one bought too.

If his affinity for teenage boys isn’t unnerving enough, Perez would like you to believe that fame = celebrity, these two things aren’t synonymous. Even as stupid as the celebrity might be, you still have to be liked to be a celebrity, and nobody likes Perez Hilton. Not even his readers, you may or may not vividly remember not buying any items from his Hot Topic “clothing line.” That’s because only 7 people showed up to the launch event and less than 7 dollars worth of merchandise was actually sold.

No One Cares

And if the fact that he is a fat fat fuck, who is not only fat, but pretty fucking fuggo in the face, makes a living off of calling other people fat doesn’t bother you, then I suppose you have a life nothing does. But aside from exclusively saving his happy comments for the underage boys men he wants to fuck and being a self-righteous cunt, the fact that he paints himself as some gay rights crusader is offensive, you know since he call Samantha Ronson, saMANtha Ronson on a fucking regular basis and outs every person who might be remotely gay because he deems it necessary even if it means ruining their careers thereby making it harder for them to come out. This is why he was booed off the stage at that AIDS fundraiser way back when. Moreover, even though he spouts his hateful diatribe on a regular basis, he condemns anyone else who voices their opinions on gay rights or one of his celebrity “friends.”

So now Will.I.Am punched him in the face according to his twitter.

- I’m in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please.
– I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke.

– Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel.

– I spoke to my lawyer. I really need to talk to the authorities. Please come to the SoHo Met Hotel. Have called the police. Need them here.

– The Toronto police are here now. Thank you. Please stop calling them.

Of course he twitter before calling the police and later admits that it was BEP’s publicist who hit him not Will, but of course that was a more interesting story. I love how he has to clearly state Will.I.Am of BLACK EYED PEAS fame.

I think I’m done with this douche.

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