Mother Left, Daughter Right

So this lady spent 50K to look like her daughter. The article basically goes, “I was ugly, my daughter is hot, people think we are twins now, tehehehehe.” There are a lot of creepy things in this world, I mean we all saw Mr. Hands get fucked by that horse.

But these are some pretty fucked up sensibilities. It’s one thing to be one of those people to get plastic surgery to look like David Allen Grier, but it’s another thing to get plastic surgery to look like someone you know. Now you may be thinking, well mothers and daughters should look  alike. So let’s see what this mother looked like before.

Love is Suicide – Candy Eyed

My skin matches my hair for some reason.

She doesn’t really look like her daughter, right? So why not get plastic surgery to look like you but better.

I’m sure every girl loves it when her mom wants to be her best friend.

Then there was the little matter of telling her daughter.

‘She was furious and begged me not to do it,’ says Janet. ‘It wasn’t that she was cross with me for wanting to look like her, it was because she was worried about me having an operation.’

For some, this might have given serious pause for thought. This was, after all, non-essential surgery, and did not come without risk. But Janet was determined.

‘I’d made up my mind,’ she says. ‘As far as I was concerned, I knew what I was doing. I wanted to look younger and felt it would do wonders for my self-esteem.’

Yeah, I’m sure your daughter was ecstatic about you wanting to look just like her. “Yay, now I get to go clubbing with my mom! I get to go on double dates with my mom! I get to go to orgies with my mom!”

Blah, blah, blah we’re obsessed with youth. Blah, blah, bah, etc. Wah. Wah. Wah. I often wonder why I have always had a problem with, I dunno what the word is– falesness. I’m not the only person, the minute you find out someone has had plastic surgery, not just me, but a lot of people kind of go “ugh.” “Why are you trying to trick us?”

I don’t think anyone is trying to trick anyone, I mean some people are. But I don’t think I am being conned when someone has fake tits or a nose job. There’s nothing objectively wrong about doing any of these things. But whenever anyone goes the extra mile to change themselves it almost feels like they are cheating.

And I always wonder, why is that bad? It’s not wrong or right; for the most part cosmetic surgeries are morally neutral. But there’s something bad about them. It’s a weird argument– but it’s kind of true. Getting a nose job may make you feel happy, but it will make the person next to you feel bad. Wah! I know. My point is, is that it confuses people. Makeup confuses people. And when you put these things behind a camera, it marginalizes this kind of confusion.

I packed you PBJ for lunch now let's go do jello shots!

That’s always been the problem with the entertainment industry. Now more than ever, the lines begin to blur between what is real and what isn’t. Before I feel like, celebrities were just famous people, untouchable, unreal. But now we know so much about them that they have become real people. But they’re not real people, Lindsay Lohan is not a real person.

Celebrities are like Greek Gods. They’re an “elite” group of people who incestuously fuck each other, literally and figuratively. We’re supposed to acknowledge that they exist, praise them and move the fuck on. We’re supposed to know that their affairs don’t affect our insignificant lives. But it just doesn’t work that way anymore. Especially when we see our myspace famous, reality tv, youtube stars somehow make it onto the red carpet.

When we see these people with their faces painted on and the camera hits Robert Downey Jr. at the angle just so you can’t see his feet and you believe he really is that tall, it confuses us. It makes us think we should be that tall and when we’re not it makes us sad. I bet a ton of moms who feel insecure and old will see this and go, “I want that!” and someone will do it and the ones who can’t will feel worse about themselves.

People watch TV, go online, read magazines and look at how those people look and it makes them sad. And not just a couple of people, a lot of people and not just the fuggo ones either. That’s why falseness is bad, because not everyone gets to go to the other side.

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