So I got all caught up on Weeds. Here is what I deduced. The show sucks. Fin. JAAAAAY KAAAAAY there’s more. Just look down, ‘tard.

I suppose if you haven’t seen up to episode eight then perhaps this might ruin some things for you.

• Silus looks like a fagoola with that new hair and that full body tan. After hours of research I’ve decided that the actor that plays Silus, Hunter Parrish is indeed a homo. Look at him hugging his fag hag!

• Shane jerked off to a picture of his mother and this incident was not mentioned or alluded to in the next episode. I guess it’s not a big deal. Or maybe they will explain it later. The writing is booty-juice this season.
• The actor who plays Nancy got fake tits and just HAD to show them off. If you want proof, just think of all the times she was in her bra, she never had any boobs!
• Doug and Andy have been demoted to B-Characters with B-plots. Harboring illegals has nothing to do with anything except for the new MEXICAN THEME!!!
• Where my Niggas at? Conrad and Heylia are either never coming back or not coming back for a while.
• Chubby little Jew girl lost a lot of weight but her head stayed the same size. Kind of like Haley Joel Osment whose head got bigger but face stayed the same. My momma always used to say, “some people gotta a lotta bit of head and a little bit a face.”
  
• Celia, Nancy, Shane and Skinny-Fat Jew girl are the only characters that have maintained the same amount of significance as they always did.
• Hispanics are not funny, EVER. So stop it! And stop trying to make us seem wise in that mysterious street smart kind of way! If you want proof just look at Carlos Mencia and George Lopez!
• The writers of Weeds have successfully extracted every bad ass character on the show. Starting with Agent Scottson, Deaf Girl, Uturn, Conrad, Heylia, Jesus Loves You Judy, Ubumchuk the Eskimo (he wasn’t really a character but WE ALL LOVED HIM) … Even now only Sanjay, Lupita and Fat Black have been seen once briefly.
• The show is starting to pick up now, but the season is almost over. What was 6-7 episodes could have been condensed into 3. I mean who really gave a shit about Andy’s Dad and Grandma, how retarded and pointless?

At the end of the day, the show is only 20 goddamned minutes so we all might as well keep watching. 500 Babillion thumbs up.

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Posted: August 8th, 2008 under rant, reviews, tv.
Comments: 2